I have been asked to speak at Campus Crusade in February. Last night, I got an email from Brian M. (the director) suggesting some topics, but he said he was open to what I wanted to talk about. He closed it by saying that most of the staff (including Brian himself) will be out of town that weekend for training.
Big mistake.
So I sent him the following email...
"Honestly, I have been thinking about some topics... but I appreciate the guidance you offered. The topics below have been burning in my heart recently... I believe God has given me a direct word for each of them...
So, from the Home office in Sugar Creek, Ohio I give you:
"Top Ten Speaking topics Paul is considering when Campus Crusade Leadership is away:"
#10 - "Baptism of the Holy Spirit: The importance of speaking in tongues for Christians today"
#9 - "Double Predestination and the Election of God's People : Don't worry about evangelism, they are all going to hell anyway"
#8 - "Open Theism: God is not sovereign, so you can get away with it."
#7 - "Politics and Christianity: If you don't believe like me you are not a Christian."
#6 - "Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God: the Sequel"
#5 - "Dan Brown Was Right: Why you should be studying the gnostic gospels"
#4 - "Prophecy and The Church: Why you need your own personal prophet and why I should be him. (subtitled: "Reach in them Jeans and Pull out them Greens!)"
#3 - "Eternal Security: You don't have it -- so spend all your energy worrying about sinning your way out of the Kingdom of God."
#2 - Two Words: "Open Cannon"
And the #1 speaking topic is.....
#1 - "The End Times: Jesus is coming back, I know exactly when, and you might as well not study for that test on Tuesday!"
I'm guessing any of those would do... right?"
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8 comments:
Paul, you are awesome. I vote for #6 or #3--I want to see you make freshman cry.....
i DOUBLE DOG DARE YOU. fantastic.
No dare to it... I actually sent him that email.
#4 is by far my favorite. And since you brought up open theism, I'll go ahead and post this link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qzf8q9QHfhI
Wow.. I think I have actually heard talks on some of these in campus groups.
The leader of the group where I spent most of my college experience was convinced (no joke) that the second coming would be within the next five years. And that was in '02...
hey, your campus leader still has one year!
if he/she is right... won't you feel bad?
actually, I guess you won't...
nevermind.
crap. what month in '02 was that?
I don't remember... but probably most of the year
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