Tuesday, September 27, 2005

"Oh my God... I will never get this time back will I?"

So my wife and I invited a friend over to watch a movie the other night. We actually had heard this movie was good... we heard wrong. "Shark boy and Lava Girl." It was only .99 and the funny thing is it was a huge loss. And then I forgot to return it today so I'm paying a late fee on a movie that... well... sucked.

So we invited mdog, my neighbor over. I called her and said, "Hey, I got a 3 D movie and you've got nothing better to do with your life than to come over to our house, eat pizza and watch it with us!"

Turns out she DID had something better to do with her life...

Let's see, what would have been a more pleasant use of time?

From the home office in Glouster, Ohio... it's the Top Ten better things to do than watch "Shark Boy"

#10. Watch re-runs of the fishing channel.
#9. Watch the stuff that hit the cutting room floor of the fishing channel. (All that editing for just 1/2 hour of fishing)
#8. Watch Keanu Reeves play Hamlet using his "Bill and Ted's" voice.
#7. Sit crammed into my elementary school desk while 10 Jr High students rake their fingers across a blackboard.
#6. Listen to a tele-marketer drone on about their latest product.
#5. Two words: root canal.
#4. Hang from my toenails while someone shoves bamboo shoots under my fingernails.
#3. Listen to a Back-street boys album... well...
#2. Spend an afternoon in a room full if life insurance salesmen...

And the number #1 thing to do instead of watching "Shark Boy and Lava Girl is...."

Fill in the blank___________________

9 comments:

paul said...

Oh my God...THANK YOU! I'm so glad you surfed over to my site and personally told me I could make over $800 in extra income! What a guy! or are you a woman? Or are you an extra terrestrial? And why the @#$# would I go to a site where some blog spammer suggested I should go? Get the !@#@ off my blog and go make some money secret shopping!

BTW, the spell check suggested as the correcct spelling for "spammer" the word "scummer." Might be right.

paul said...

sorry for the above rant. I really hate spam. No.. you don't understand... I really hate spam.

Anonymous said...

oh. i thought "anonymous" was just suggesting that as the #1 thing better to do than watch "sharkboy and lava girl."

by the way, i watched a movie last night (that i've seen before) but which is likely much better (i've never seen the aforementioned 3D-saster). it's called "cradle will rock" and is about the WPA and the federal theatre in the 1930s. great cast. check it out.

mdog said...

...listening to "from a distance" on repeat in a room you can't unlock from the inside.





[btw, i think there's some sort of setting on blogger that discourages spam... like you have to type in certain symbols to prove you're human. alternatively, you could disable anonymous posting as well.]

Sarah said...

Oh, mdog, you win... Unless we have to listen to "Dirty Old Egg-Sucking Dog," which once is funny and twice is uncomfortable and it just goes downhill from there. (Johnny Cash, ladies and gentlemen.)

On the other hand, if we were all drinking....

mdog said...

do you have a copy? i think we just discovered plans for the weekend.

J.O.B said...

Home office in Glouster, OH? What's that about?

paul said...

not sure who JOB is but it is a takeoff from David Letterman.

J.O.B said...

It's Billie - your facebook buddy!!! JOB means Jake (dog) Olivia (baby) and Billie (me). And I get the Dave Letterman thing, but the Glouster mention threw me off. ;-)