This life is hard. In fact, it's a lot harder for many than it is for me. But even for me there is a lot of stuff to this life and sometimes it's easy to feel overwhelmed. There is so much to do... and it's easy to let people make you feel guilty for not doing their agenda or fitting their mold....
...but I live "between the trees"...
Between God's intention and and his redemption of creation.
And therefore it will not "all work out"... and all relationships will not be resolved, and all prayers will not be answered the way I want them and my friends will divorce and we will not all see eye to eye and I will feel alone at times and the poor will always be with us and I will always struggle with sin...
I live "between the trees"
And yet my God is eternal. And I'm connected to Him in a relationship that will continue long after the crap of this world passes away. And even more than that...God is in me. Eternity is in me.
Why would God love me us much that he would intrust me with His Spirit?
Monday, March 28, 2005
Monday, March 21, 2005
Spring Break Blog
So I have this temptation to write something scandalous and post it for two or three days, knowing that no one is reading this blog over break. If anyone has any questions they would like to ask me... especially if they are scandelous... I will answert them for two days. :O)
Boy is it quiet in here...
Boy is it quiet in here...
Wednesday, March 16, 2005
sex
There is a title for a post to get your attention. And now that I have your attention, please go to mdog's blog and chime in!
http://unleashed.squarespace.com/
http://unleashed.squarespace.com/
Sunday, March 06, 2005
Sovereignty and Prayer
So, if you look back to the "Prayer" post, I actually started a new discussion in response to an excellent observation one of my fellow bloggers wrote. I would be curious about your thoughts.
Friday, March 04, 2005
Thursday, March 03, 2005
Prayer
"The great temptation in our day is to neglect or avoid the practices of God while actively working to achieve what we believe to the be the mission of God."
Quote by Richard Foster at Asbury Seminary
Quote by Richard Foster at Asbury Seminary
Wednesday, March 02, 2005
Friendship
So I'm trying to take Wednesday's off. A regular day off is a discipline...I want to work because I have so much to do. There is always more to do...work piles up even as I type. My daughter is sleeping and I'm sort of down for some reason. So why not blog and share my feelings with a bunch of fellow bloggers. Actually, I'm just reflecting (which is part of my day off discipline so I guess it's okay).
So a while back I wrote that I miss play. I still do. Last night some friends came over and we played a board game. It was fun and refreshing to me...so why don't I do this kind of thing more? Well, it takes work. Play takes work. Going to other people's homes is complicated with a baby, finding a day free on the schedule is always difficult. I can't just do what I want to do, I want my wife included as well, and she is less likely to just go to hang out with a large group of people. Life is just complicated. Friendship is complicated.
But my soul feels weak and deep friendship is healing...
Do you all have a "best friend?" I guess you can define that the way you want to, but I define it as a person who is your closest friend and you are theirs'. For me, the reciprocity is important. My wife and I have some people we like, but we are probably not the first people they would call.
To be honest, there is a certain amount of fear in becoming close with people as they may leave or hurt you.
So maybe I'm being too vulnerable here, but I've had a lot of pain in the friendship area. A couple we were really close with moved away a couple of years back. He went to get a doctorate, their stay in my town was temporary. Yes, we talk every now and then...but it's never the same. Several years ago my wife and I lost our best friends to some conflict involving my work. I can remember when we first met, we went out to dinner together. I was working in another town, there were not a lot of people our age. So from the moment we ran into each other there was this connection. When we came home from dinner I was so filled with life. I had so much energy. I actually said to my wife, "do you think they like us? I hope they like us!" (I felt like I was in junior high!) The following night they invited us over for dinner and a movie. And for years after that, we just did life together. Lots of fun, lots of pain, lots of time...the 4 of us. I'm big on reconciliation, but honestly, I've given up hope on that one ever being restored.
It's easy to have lots of acquaintances and no friends, you know? In fact, I would even say I have lots of friends. I really do. (But I even hold them at arms length at times as I realize many of them will move. In my life right now, I have 15 people that are considering moving...many of them my closest friends.) But there is something in us (I suspect it has to do with being made in the image of a relational God) that makes us long to deeply connect with other people. "It is not good for a man to be alone" I suspect was not just talking about marriage.
There are many times I wanted to become Amish. Work hard all day, friends come over and you sit out on the porch together, drink lemonade and talk. And work is defined by the daylight and by the barn being built with your family and friends. And dinner is shared around the table. People just stop by and they don't carry around planners. There is a community committed to helping folks work out conflict.
And weak souls become strong.
Maybe it doesn't exist. But how I long for my local church to be like that. It would take a counter cultural people who were willing to think about time, and life, and work, and commitment in a different way. It would take a simplifying of the NUMBER of commitments so that the DEPTH of commitment could be there. And maybe that is just unrealistic this side of heaven.
"Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, 'Now the dwelling of God is with people, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.'"
So a while back I wrote that I miss play. I still do. Last night some friends came over and we played a board game. It was fun and refreshing to me...so why don't I do this kind of thing more? Well, it takes work. Play takes work. Going to other people's homes is complicated with a baby, finding a day free on the schedule is always difficult. I can't just do what I want to do, I want my wife included as well, and she is less likely to just go to hang out with a large group of people. Life is just complicated. Friendship is complicated.
But my soul feels weak and deep friendship is healing...
Do you all have a "best friend?" I guess you can define that the way you want to, but I define it as a person who is your closest friend and you are theirs'. For me, the reciprocity is important. My wife and I have some people we like, but we are probably not the first people they would call.
To be honest, there is a certain amount of fear in becoming close with people as they may leave or hurt you.
So maybe I'm being too vulnerable here, but I've had a lot of pain in the friendship area. A couple we were really close with moved away a couple of years back. He went to get a doctorate, their stay in my town was temporary. Yes, we talk every now and then...but it's never the same. Several years ago my wife and I lost our best friends to some conflict involving my work. I can remember when we first met, we went out to dinner together. I was working in another town, there were not a lot of people our age. So from the moment we ran into each other there was this connection. When we came home from dinner I was so filled with life. I had so much energy. I actually said to my wife, "do you think they like us? I hope they like us!" (I felt like I was in junior high!) The following night they invited us over for dinner and a movie. And for years after that, we just did life together. Lots of fun, lots of pain, lots of time...the 4 of us. I'm big on reconciliation, but honestly, I've given up hope on that one ever being restored.
It's easy to have lots of acquaintances and no friends, you know? In fact, I would even say I have lots of friends. I really do. (But I even hold them at arms length at times as I realize many of them will move. In my life right now, I have 15 people that are considering moving...many of them my closest friends.) But there is something in us (I suspect it has to do with being made in the image of a relational God) that makes us long to deeply connect with other people. "It is not good for a man to be alone" I suspect was not just talking about marriage.
There are many times I wanted to become Amish. Work hard all day, friends come over and you sit out on the porch together, drink lemonade and talk. And work is defined by the daylight and by the barn being built with your family and friends. And dinner is shared around the table. People just stop by and they don't carry around planners. There is a community committed to helping folks work out conflict.
And weak souls become strong.
Maybe it doesn't exist. But how I long for my local church to be like that. It would take a counter cultural people who were willing to think about time, and life, and work, and commitment in a different way. It would take a simplifying of the NUMBER of commitments so that the DEPTH of commitment could be there. And maybe that is just unrealistic this side of heaven.
"Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, 'Now the dwelling of God is with people, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.'"
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